Transparency, i.e., openness and honesty is a quality we all value. What does it take to be transparent? The best way to understand this is by turning the spotlight onto ourselves.
Being Transparent with others starts with being Transparent with oneself.
By being transparent with ourselves, we can gain a deeper sense of the stories we tell ourselves which drive our behaviour.
“Every game in life is actually played on a 6-inch ground – the space between the two ears”, said Martina Navratilova.
We live in our minds. By keeping this area uncluttered, we can apply ourselves freshly to any situation.
Here is the MIRROR method for being more transparent.
A prerequisite for using this method is curiosity for self-development and willingness for self-management
Step-1: M – Monitor
It is easy to monitor others, but it takes a bit of practice to become aware of one’s own thoughts, emotions, and actions.
Monitoring here is about making a mental note of times in the day when we feel unnatural. Body language and sensations in the body are good indicators of how natural we are.
Naturalness is a state when we are self-confident, stable. This is the state when transparency shines, on the contrary when we are not natural, it is difficult to be open, honest.
Learning to observe oneself is a skill worth developing
Step-2: I – Isolate
Take time to pause and be with yourself. This is valuable and often taken lightly.
Find a space in your day when you can disconnect and just be with yourself.
Step-3: R – Reflect
Ask yourself some reflective questions about what you noted about your day. The objective of this reflection is to understand yourself better.
Some Self-coaching questions could be: What made me think or act in a certain way? Is there something I would like to change about my response the next time?
Step-4: R – Reconsider
This step is simply about rethinking the scenario from a perspective that best serves your state of mind.
Some Self-coaching questions could be: Do I want to think or act differently? How might it help me if I am able to apply myself differently?
Step-5: O – Organise
It is one thing to know something, it’s another thing to be able to do something different. This step is to work on yourself. Rewiring the brain requires intent, effort, and patience.
Some Self-coaching questions could be: What will it take to apply myself differently? What small steps am I willing to take to change how I feel?
Talking to coaches, mentors is a great way to re-organize one’s thoughts and actions.
Step-6: R – Reapply
The proof of the pudding is in the tasting. The real effectiveness of something can only be determined by putting it to the test by trying or using it.
Reapply here simply means to take initiative to do the steps identified.
Progress is Perfection in the journey of Self-management
Patience, Perseverance, and Self-compassion are the 3 pillars when it comes to any learning. More so when it comes to self-management as this learning is only evident to the person in question until the change in behaviour becomes evident to others.
Here is a ready reckoner.
Enjoy the MIRROR process, use it as many times as you need to master the Art of Transparency.